Friday, April 29, 2011

will the revolution...

As the world (2 billion a unnu is nuff people) gathered today to watch the Royal wedding the rants of "down with the monarchy they cause slavery", "there are more important things to worry like Syria, Libya, Yemen in the world" and "who really cares about these two?, like seriously?" have risen to the surface once again. And with good reason, we are such a dejected world that signs of exaltation are to be mocked and discarded from our lives forthwith. Interestingly enough I find that he majority of the people complaining weren't contributing anything meaningful previous to the manifestation of this wedding so what does that say? At first glance it says unnu jus red eye and badmind. The people dem a have dem big fancy wedding and dem nuh serve no other purpose than fi look good and you wish you coulda do it too. At second glance it says that your social activism is a falsified. Its not genuine, it means nothing, its just as meaningless and pointless as the wedding that you are boycotting.

What revolution are you observing? What chances are you taking? And the monarchy ruined Africa, took us from our homelands. And? We're here now in our individual places. How do you plan to fight today's battles? You think the monarchy a guh turn back di hands of time? Yuh want them to send you all back to Africa and return you to pre-1492? What are you really arguing about and is it really helping you? And so the media ignores the wedding and gives around the clock coverage of Gadaffi and his buffoonery, what then? You will feel better in your conscience knowing that we are highlighting the 'right things'? You can cuss NATO and spit at Gadaffi and tell the people of Libya to die for the cause but what of your revolution. I for one will admit I have buckling knees. I'm not the placard sign, marching through the streets kind of girl. But anyone who has seen a Ruff Draft Production knows I don't shy away from the revolution.

Seriously, while your bitching at Anderson Cooper while lusting after him, WHAT are YOU doing? WHERE are you in the revolution? Are you sitting in your office waiting for this JPS thing to blow over or are you going to do something? We want to sit and watch the revolution in the comfort of our living rooms but the truth is we are in need of our own revolution.

It sounds like a dream but we are dropping like flies for no cause other than anger, ego and misplaced emotions- we might as well die for a purpose. This is not a revolution of the rich needing to give to the poor. So a rich man takes some of his wealth and gives it to a poor man... its a temporary reprieve. The revolution we need is to change our culture of immediacy. We NEED it NOW. The greatest example of this is the short-lived leadership of our first female Prime Minister. I for one never felt the woman was fit for the job but she never stood a fighting chance. As we people we somehow managed to convince herself that Sister P was the light and she would become Prime Minister on Monday and Tuesday all would be fixed simply because she was a woman. Her first 100 days were the most scrutinised. As JPS proves these bad ideas are age-old and weren't born over night. I WISH at least one politician would admit this, take responsibility for something. The PNP finds the JPS agreement 'morally repugnant'. You signed said agreement. It was your mistake.

Which brings me to our second revolution. The revolution of culpability. We want everyone else to be culpable. We want the monarchy to admit, apologise and apparently reverse slavery. We want Gadaffi to step down, to walk away and save the people but we won't do it at home. The rebuilding of Egypt, Tunisia and other countries to come will not be easy and the people have accepted this. We want the change but without the work. And as such we are all culpable. If yuh 'waan good yuh nose haffi run'. We say to ourselves "they voted them in and now them a pay di price". I would ask you. Did you see their options? We all have the answers but we don't want to take the bull by the horns and try. Ras Astor Black may be a little warped in the head but him a try a ting. What are we trying?

I tried something. I got tired and dejected and left. And is it better here? That will never be a yes or no question. The privilege of my uptown-ness has given me a wider perspective of my homeland and now that I live in this 'greener pasture' that my people run to I don't feel free. I am angrier at my people than ever before. We have it, we have something amazing...fucking amazing and we are leaving it to go to shit for pride and hype.

Which leaves me to my next revolutionary request. 'Get the fuck over yourselves'. No one owes you anything. You want it! Get it! WILL THE REVOLUTION!

Friday, April 15, 2011

'This is Canada' And??? *raised eyebrow*

If another Canadian says to me 'This is Canada'. I a guh shoot dem. straight. mi nah tek back no chat.
Mi undastand say unnu have big land mass weh unnu a try populate and all these things but don't judge me by my country's size. wi likkle but we tallawah.
Like when yuh a guh mek mi know say "we don't leave dishes in the sink because this is Canada and in Canada you can get roaches." Really though??? Really??? Come a Jamaica mek I show you roach since apparently in Canada roach is an exotic specie. More importantly wah yuh think di plate a guh siddung deh til next week. Mi sure mi nuh gi yuh no reason fi think me nasty. Mi come from Jamaica we love scorn nasty people yuh hear.

Better yet mek mi show yuh scorpion and stray dog weh murderous ina yuh back yaad.

And when we have a conversation and yuh come a tell mi say "well in Canada people are looking for work and its not easy. yuh know This is Canada things are hard here." I understand the sentiment and I get it nuh easy. Really what separates your poverty from my poverty is the architecture but yuh did need fi drop the "this is Canada". How about "this is life".

And as for the ones who want to ask questions about how I am adjusting try asking "How do you like it here?" instead of "This is Canada it must be a complete difference from being Jamaica many more opportunities." Why yes. There are many differences. I have a question why Toronto don't free up di liquor? Oh that's not what you were talking about. Oh you were talking about is this my own 'jungle book'. You Tarzan. Me Jane kinda thing. No I didnt swing from a vine and sneak unto a banana boat to get here. But I will also blame that on the Jamaicans who think say as the plane land dem a guh and apparently the donkey cart will be our major mode of transportation. Who are shocked that the land of their birth has actually evolved. It nuh perfect but it nuh primitive.
And another note to the 'This is Canada' revolution that dispute that you are having with that line. That asshole moment you trying to create. Its really between yourself and the US of A. That chip on your shoulder was not put there by me or my vine-swinging, tree living people. So let's trade in the 'This is Canada' for something a little nicer.

Well This is Jamaica where if you step pon mi toe yuh might lose yuh foot.
Because the next person who says 'This is Canada' to me. I will proudly be shipped home for 'decking your dumb ass'.

A writer's lament

What does it mean to be a writer? In coming to terms with my passion for words and making the decision that this will be my career path I have asked myself this question on numerous occasions. The answer is rarely, if ever, something beautiful. The experiences I have had professionally skews the answer towards 'rough'. And it's not as simple the 'life of the starving artist'. Working through my passion has taught me that artists don't need to starve. Funnily enough writers are the 'soup kitchen' tenants of the artistry world, we define starving artist. As a world we don't seem to value creative property as we should. After all what is a book but black words on white paper as compared to a canvas which is often so many colours or modern day graphics which uses so much technology to create worlds within worlds. It could take one weeks, months, years to paint the perfect 'Monet-inspired piece' or to create the next great cartoon but how long does it take someone to write the next New York Times Best selling novel? It could take weeks, months or years. So the question is why is the writer always fighting so much harder to prove his or her worth. It could be because people don't like to read. Yet, I refuse to accept its that simple. Why? When someone approaches you to put their idea or any idea on paper and they expect that it should cost nothing or very little because its just pieces of paper with black letters on them. No it isn't. Its hours of thought, of research, of writing, of editing and writing again. Its moments of writer's block. Every creative process involves so much and when it comes from your brain and your heart it involves so much more. Any artist from any artistic field will tell you that. It is just as multi-layered as building a house and if its not done right it will fall apart. But what makes being the underpaid, under-respected writer even more frustration is writing that commercial that is playing REPEATEDLY on your television screen and remembering that you bargained from JA$10,000 to JA$2,000 because of the 'small budget'. Its not the small budget. Its your lack of respect for creative property, for the writer's process. Most everything begins with a script- its written down by someone somewhere but somehow writing is viewed as easy come easy go and treated like its worth even less. And its BULLSHIT. Writers are slaving away at typewriters and computers long before the designer is brought in or the director sometimes before the cameraman even knows there is a script but hey thanks for your commitment now take your chicken shit pay and leave.
I'm fed up with "Can I get a movie script in a month?" Sure you can but for me to work around the clock for a month I am going to need to be paid for that time WHILE I am doing the work. What happens if you don't want the script? What happens to WORK I did for you? There is electricity for the computer, there is sustenance to keep me going while writing. I don't shit these things out. I use my brain cells. I write, weep, write, scream, write, drink, write and write and write. My printer it uses ink and paper and electricity. Pens run out of ink as well and sometimes all the thinking gives you migraines. You're going to hire me then pay and don't tell me shit about providing images- that's a photographer's job, another artistic profession and I not 'tiefing' no food off no man's plate. What's my profession? I'm a writer. My tools are passion, brain cells, time, effort, thought, printer, paper, ink, computer, mass storage device, google, the library, TV, radio, magazines, books,life, conversation, people, images, wind, sun, air, light, food, money, gas, transportation, phone, patience, emotion and oh yea...words.

Friday, April 1, 2011

A mussi me name Hawkeye

Let me start by saying I can understand the panic that comes over a person when their car has been stolen. Its really the heights of violating another human being but what about my rights.
Yes, I am speaking to you. The one sending the BBMs about whoffa car get tief, wha colour it be, all di tings that inside there and how much di owna miss it.
How kind of you to care soooooooooo much?
Now let's step back and think about the part you didn't before you did type di first letter much less press send
When I get the message that says 1952 Aston Martin, white with a dent on the back is missing weh mi mus do?
Worse when it come een Wednesday night at 1am (I am assuming here that most people are in bed at this time.)
But say I do see said car at the stoplight in Liguanea.
Do I jump like an ape going "o o o o o o it's the car, it's the car."
Do I call the police or do I send out a BBM in return?
BBM- "Stolen car seen at the stoplight in Liguanea, the thief is kinda cute still, nice jawline...oh wait, its driving off in the direction of Mona, since Matilda's Corner police station is right there should I tell them?"
*taps fingers*
We now wait for the Macgyvers and Magnum P.Is on my Blackberry to tell me how to move forward in this situation.
I understand the panic I really do.
Yuh waan di car and yuh a try a ting but it seems to be an over-dependence on the BBM that has resulted in this act.
and if yuh don't trust di police isn't this a job for Hawkeye or Guardsman?
And I feel that the messages should be dated
I find we get messages saying the Aston Martin was stolen today 3 days later.
Please BBM responsibly!